Winter Storm 2021 Thoughts

Dear Librans,

I hope you’re doing well. I’m writing today, without a self-improvement angle, but with an, “I need to release this negative energy” approach.

I’m sure you’ve already heard about the challenges here in Texas and across the country related to the winter storm that I’m calling the Big Cold of 2021.

My family is doing well – folks have power and water – and I’m slowly trying to make contact with friends/colleagues to see how they’re doing.

I didn’t experience the level of hardship that many throughout the State faced but as an empath, I was more affected by the happenings than even I wanted to concede.

Well, this morning I could no longer ignore how I was feeling. I had to have a cry to release this built up energy. I also participated in a virtual wellness room on one of my apps for community-building.

I’m feeling a bit better now that I’ve had some positive light shown into my world.

The ice is gone, at least where I am, and I don’t have to take baby steps with my little pocket dog now. I heard some awesome affirmations and I actually spoke up to let folks know that I wasn’t feeling perfect in the moment.

There is still some hurt out there so please share some positive love energy with not only folks here in Texas but throughout the world. Someone will appreciate you for it!

Love and Light!

P.S. I will post an entry, hopefully later today, with links if you want and are able to provide assistance for those that have been harmed by this winter storm.

Forgiving Me

Dear Librans,

I’m starting to journal/blog more as part of my self-care practice. Last year, for many of us, was very difficult to say the least. Between the general election, COVID, self-quarantine, social justice and so much more, the shit hit the fan – multiple times.

A good thing that came from 2020 for me was the fact that I couldn’t distract myself from my healing journey. I needed to think of different ways to continue on my path. Part of that is journaling.

My Prompt is, “What do you forgive yourself for?”

Just typing those words make me tear up – not because I’m sad but because I realize how much work I’ve put into myself over the past few years.

In a nutshell, I’ve forgiven myself for just being able to survive without having the tools to enjoy life.

I was stuck in a pattern of limiting beliefs – even though I didn’t know what that was at the time – and living in a Ground Hog Day pattern. Things just kept happening over and over and over again and I didn’t have confidence. On the outside, the world thought I was fine but inside I was a hurt and unfulfilled mess.

Once I began taking part in counseling and working through my emotional turmoil, I felt as though weights were being lifted from my shoulders. This is still a process I’m working through but I’m so much further down my road of healing now!

Yes, I get sad and disappointed – I’m human – but now I’m able to share with trusted folks that I need help or comfort. I try really hard not to play into the old gender role of, “Me man, me strong,” and grunting like Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor from Home Improvement.

The world seems like a brand new place because I chose to invest in myself and forgive me. Now I celebrate me as much as possible – because I’m worth it!!

Love and Light!

P.S. Have you ever needed to forgive yourself before? What was that process like for you? I hope you join me in the comments in “celebrating self!”

Feeling a Little Blue

Dear Librans,

Today is such a weird day for me…

On one hand, I’ve been getting some interesting cases at work that will allow me to think outside the box for my clients; I’ve been finding some really great books to add to my “Want to Read” list for this year and I’m going to participate in a 6-week training course that I’ve been eager to take part in.

But on the other hand, today I started to feel very lonely.

I’m having such a lack of human contact that it feels as though I’m being crushed by it. Ordinarily, I hold myself out to be an introvert. With the self-quarantine though, sometimes it gets to me.

I’m tired of talking on the phone and over Zoom and looking at the four walls. I feel a bit sad today.

Logically, I know that everyday can’t be peaches and cream but when this feeling hits, especially during this pandemic, it really hits.

This is not going to be a long post today. I just want to ask, “Do you deal with pandemic loneliness? If so, what are some practical things you do to get over that hump?

I’m eager to hear from you. Love and Light!

Signs You Need a Life Reset

Maybe you have been reading about resetting your life and making healthy changes, but you still aren’t sure if YOU need to do it. Here are some common signs of needing to take a closer look at your life and make changes that will benefit you in the long run.

You Are Experiencing Burnout

The first sign that you are in need of a reset in your life is when you are experiencing burnout. This often happens when you are either working too much, or focusing so much on one thing, that the rest of your life is being neglected.

It is possible to have burnout even when you don’t feel “busy” constantly. Burnout can happen from focusing too much on one area of your life, which makes it to where you are so exhausted with that certain activity or aspect of your life, the rest of your life is kind of falling behind.

This happened to me not so long ago with my volunteer work. I went from having delighted feelings to those of anger and resentment. Needless to say, it wasn’t a good feeling.

You Keep Trying (and Failing) New Things

Have you noticed that you keep trying new things toward a specific goal, but then you quit pretty soon afterward or lose your steam? This is a really good time to do a reset and try to find where your priorities are.

This isn’t always just a case of having no follow-through. Sometimes, it is because you need to reevaluate things, remind yourself why you set these goals, and figure out what tasks would be better suited for you to complete those goals.

You Haven’t Worked on Your Goals in a While

Maybe you have goals that you thought you really wanted, but you never seem to work on them much. Things happen and lives get busy, but if it has been months or even years, then now is the time to either decide how to reach those goals, or replace them with something else you are more passionate about.

You Feel Stuck, Helpless, or Unmotivated

And lastly, if you have been feeling a little stuck, lost, or just unmotivated, it is time to look at your life and figure out what isn’t quite working for you. These feelings can come from many things, from your mental health to just being overworked.

Start writing in a journal or blog to figure out why you are experiencing these emotions, and work on a life reset so you can get down to what is happening and why you feel this way.

Have you ever needed a life reset? What were some signs that you noticed and what was your first step in changing?

Love and Light!

You Got Too Much Stuff

Erykah Badu said it best,

 

Bag lady you gone hurt your back
Dragging all them bags like that
I guess nobody ever told you
All you must hold onto, is you, is you, is you

One day all them bags gon’ get in your way
One day all them bags gon’ get in your way
I said one day all them bags gon’ get in your way
One day all them bags gon’ get in your way, so pack light,
Pack light, mm, pack light, pack light, oh ooh

Bag lady you gon’ miss your bus
You can’t hurry up, ’cause you got too much stuff
When they see you coming, niggas take off running
From you it’s true, oh yes they do

One day he gon’ say you crowding my space
One day he gon’ say you crowding my space
I said one day he gon’ say you crowding my space
One day he gon’ say you crowding my space so, pack light
Pack light

 

Do you have that one piece of old baggage or energy drain that you’ve been carrying around for what seems like forever?

 

It reminds me when I pack too heavily for a trip where I need to take a flight. I have all these suitcases and I forget that I need to get them in the airport.

 

I’ve got one bag over my shoulder…

 

One duffle is under my armpit…

 

I’m holding one in my hand…

 

…and I’m running late to get to the gate!! YIKES!!!!

 

There are a lot of us that are trying to carry our figurative bags all day, every day and we wonder why we’re not seeming to get anywhere as fast as we want.

 

I’m not immune to this myself. I have some emotional “stuff” that I think I’ve been holding on to for way too long … and my damn shoulders are hurting and slouched…

 

The good thing though is that we don’t have to keep dragging our bags! That’s great, right?

 

Most of us don’t want to carry all the “stuff” around with us but just like the luggage, after holding on to it for so long our hands and shoulders and back become cramped and strained … all because we wouldn’t let go! Guess what? That first instant where we decide to let go, it hurts like hell!! We’ve trained our extremities to become warped and uncomfortable and it takes time to get the blood flowing and for the tingling to stop.

 

Well, it’s the same concept with our emotional baggage… Because we’ve trained our minds to be uncomfortable, the first sign of relief is almost unbearable. We have to think past that initial struggle and think about that moment after, and the next moment, and the next moment and so on and understand that true relief is right around the corner!

 

The very first thing we have to do is decide, “Hey, I wanna put these damn bags down…” Then we take a deep breath and let go…Then we need to work the kinks from our emotional mindset – just as we do physically – with proper movement, training and simply learning to not do the things that got us to that feeling of discomfort.

 

Here are some things that I’ve done when letting go of baggage:

 

  • Take part in counseling or therapy
  • Listen to relaxing, meditative music
  • Stay a bit busier than normal so I won’t “fall into old patterns
  • Reach out to friends to catch up

 

We have the tools within us to begin the healing process for ourselves. If we can decide, “I want a change in my circumstance,” the following steps we need get a bit easier if we stick to our goal…whatever that may be.

 

What do you think? Do my thoughts make sense? What are some things you do to “release your bags?” I’d love to read your thoughts in the comments below. Let’s chat!

 

A Reader’s Review of Broken

> Broken

Broken by Nicola Haken
Broken
byNicola Haken (Goodreads Author)16756228

Will Burley‘s review

Apr 05, 2019  ·  edit
really liked it
I’m so torn on my thoughts about this book…

What I absolutely loved about it is that it deals with mental health issues. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that in a gay romance. There’s a lot of people that will encounter this throughout their dating/relationship life. I think the author dealt quite well with the fear that goes into finding out that someone you feel is sexually appealing has a “hidden secret“ about their mental health and the symptoms associated with that.

My main qualm about the book is that even though there is this “Obstacle“ to overcome, it still feels somewhat too perfect… overall, I did enjoy this book and will seek out others to read by this author.