Winter Storm 2021 Thoughts

Dear Librans,

I hope you’re doing well. I’m writing today, without a self-improvement angle, but with an, “I need to release this negative energy” approach.

I’m sure you’ve already heard about the challenges here in Texas and across the country related to the winter storm that I’m calling the Big Cold of 2021.

My family is doing well – folks have power and water – and I’m slowly trying to make contact with friends/colleagues to see how they’re doing.

I didn’t experience the level of hardship that many throughout the State faced but as an empath, I was more affected by the happenings than even I wanted to concede.

Well, this morning I could no longer ignore how I was feeling. I had to have a cry to release this built up energy. I also participated in a virtual wellness room on one of my apps for community-building.

I’m feeling a bit better now that I’ve had some positive light shown into my world.

The ice is gone, at least where I am, and I don’t have to take baby steps with my little pocket dog now. I heard some awesome affirmations and I actually spoke up to let folks know that I wasn’t feeling perfect in the moment.

There is still some hurt out there so please share some positive love energy with not only folks here in Texas but throughout the world. Someone will appreciate you for it!

Love and Light!

P.S. I will post an entry, hopefully later today, with links if you want and are able to provide assistance for those that have been harmed by this winter storm.

Building a Relationship with Yourself

Dear Librans,

When you think about how you feel about yourself, and how well you know yourself, how do you score on a scale of 1 – 10? If you feel that you know yourself very well, but you are on the lower side of how much you like yourself, then it might be time to start thinking about how you can build a better relationship with YOU, and the next paragraphs will be exploring how to accomplish this.

Stop Focusing on the Dealings of Others

There are tons of distractions that can be found out in the world, but some of the worst distractions to get involved with are those that come from spending too much time focusing on and critiquing the lives of others. It can be extremely easy to fall into the habit of spending your time concerning yourself with the movements of others, and you may even spend time discussing these things with others, but it’s important to note that while you’re focusing on others, you’re avoiding work that you can be doing on yourself.

Another side of this, is that it might be a manifestation of insecurities that you feel towards yourself due to constant comparing. The person who is aware of the nuances of how you feel would be you because people can’t read the minds of others. If you feel as though you are constantly scrutinized by others, it’s important to remember that they might not even be aware that you feel any discomfort at all. Most of the time, people are primarily focused on how they are seen by others.

Learn to Forgive People

It’s hard to make a better relationship with yourself when you carry a lot of baggage from past dealings with people. Things sometimes happen that can make you feel a little bit sour about having relationships with others but it’s important to remember that you don’t need to hold onto these things. Let them just be things that happened and move on. It’s been said that forgiving people is more about being healthier for yourself than the person you’re forgiving. This is because holding onto anger and pain will only cause you to feel negatively about a lot of other things in your life.

Once you have forgiven someone completely, the part of your mind that has been holding onto those toxic thoughts and feeling will be free to focus on better things. You can use that brain power to think of ways to put good things into the world around you. There are a lot of ways to spread positivity, and the best ways involve doing something for others.

Take Time to Help Someone in Need

There are few joys that can compare to the feeling you get when you help someone who really needs help. When you’ve been spending a lot of time focusing on yourself in unhealthy ways, a really good way to break out of that is also to help someone else. This puts them in the forefront of your mind for a time, and this can help you to appreciate the situation that you have as well.

There are a lot of programs that involve helping the homeless and elderly, and both are in constant need of volunteers that can help dilute the strain placed on other people who are already busy in the community. You might be surprised by the outpouring of gratitude that comes from people who haven’t been used to getting the help that you’re helping to provide. This can create connections and inspire the future success of people who might not have had the opportunity otherwise.

Write a Journal or a Letter to Yourself

Part of getting to the deeper parts of yourself is taking time out of your day to put your thoughts on paper so that you can read them back to yourself. Sometimes it takes this kind of exercise to be able to get a sense of what is truly on your mind. You might have doubts about recent decisions, or you might need to see your thoughts out in front of you to make those final choices. Whatever the case may be, this will help you to begin to prioritize your feelings and thoughts about things. Once you’ve drawn some conclusions it’ll be easier to make real changes based on the information you have about yourself.

Practice Positive Self-Talk

After you’ve taken some time to think about the things you wrote down to yourself, make some effort to replace anything negative that you said to yourself with something that is positive. Talk about your abilities. Tell yourself that you can accomplish your goals. The more that you repeat these things to yourself, the more possible they will become.

Look, I realize that all of what I wrote above is easier said than done. Trust me, I know that for sure. It takes practice and sometimes “falling on your face,” but if you keep trying and taking those baby steps, you will eventually get to where you want to go.

What do you think about my list? I would love for you to join in the conversation in the comments below.

As always, “Love and Light!”

Forgiving Me

Dear Librans,

I’m starting to journal/blog more as part of my self-care practice. Last year, for many of us, was very difficult to say the least. Between the general election, COVID, self-quarantine, social justice and so much more, the shit hit the fan – multiple times.

A good thing that came from 2020 for me was the fact that I couldn’t distract myself from my healing journey. I needed to think of different ways to continue on my path. Part of that is journaling.

My Prompt is, “What do you forgive yourself for?”

Just typing those words make me tear up – not because I’m sad but because I realize how much work I’ve put into myself over the past few years.

In a nutshell, I’ve forgiven myself for just being able to survive without having the tools to enjoy life.

I was stuck in a pattern of limiting beliefs – even though I didn’t know what that was at the time – and living in a Ground Hog Day pattern. Things just kept happening over and over and over again and I didn’t have confidence. On the outside, the world thought I was fine but inside I was a hurt and unfulfilled mess.

Once I began taking part in counseling and working through my emotional turmoil, I felt as though weights were being lifted from my shoulders. This is still a process I’m working through but I’m so much further down my road of healing now!

Yes, I get sad and disappointed – I’m human – but now I’m able to share with trusted folks that I need help or comfort. I try really hard not to play into the old gender role of, “Me man, me strong,” and grunting like Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor from Home Improvement.

The world seems like a brand new place because I chose to invest in myself and forgive me. Now I celebrate me as much as possible – because I’m worth it!!

Love and Light!

P.S. Have you ever needed to forgive yourself before? What was that process like for you? I hope you join me in the comments in “celebrating self!”

Using Essential Oils on Your Pets

Dear Librans,

Can you believe it’s Thursday and day 4 of my blog writing challenge?!?! I already messed up a bit but instead of moaning and feeling like a failure because I’m not perfect, I’m continuing on with the task! Yay me!!!

But I digress…

I’m really getting into essential oils in a big way. They have a long list of benefits for adults and even kids, but don’t forget you can also use them on your pets. Since I have a fur baby over here, I’ve been doing some extra research. You just need to use the right oils and be extra careful with your dogs and cats to ensure you are practicing safety.

Safe Oils for Your Pets

There are some essential oils known to be safe for most animals, including cats and dogs. You should always test a small area of your dog’s fur with a diluted oil before using it on them or with their bed and other toy furnishings. However, the following oils tend to be good for most cats and dogs:

Lavender – This is an amazing oil for relaxing your pets, reducing anxiety in the car, and helping with health issues like allergies and insomnia.

– Frankincense is often used with dogs who have early signs of cancer, tumors, or stomach ulcers.

Cardamom – A holistic vet might recommend using cardamom if your pet is having trouble eating, has nausea or heartburn, or is dealing with a bad cough.

Spearmint – Spearmint is great for helping your dog or cat to lose weight, but can also be used for nausea and diarrhea.

No Citrus for Cats

There are some specific oils that breeds don’t like or might make them ill. For cats, this includes any of the citrus oils. Avoid using citrus like grapefruit, lemon, or orange with your cat, as it could affect their liver and how it detoxes of toxins. Some others that don’t particularly like are oregano, tea tree, birch, cinnamon, clove, wintergreen, and thyme.

Oils to Avoid for Dogs

Dogs also have some specific oils that are good or bad for them. The previous list of acceptable oils should all be fine for your dog, unless they have an allergy to these scents or plants. However, there are some known to be toxic or unhealthy for dogs in general, especially for dogs with sensitive skin or allergies. These include:

Clove
Wintergreen
Juniper
Thyme
Anise

As with humans, you want to dilute essential oils properly for pets and test a small area of their skin before using them. Ask your vet if you have any questions or concerns about using essential oils on your pets. Only a very small amount should be needed, so don’t add a large amount of drops to their shampoo or rub it on their skin, as it is likely not necessary and might be harmful.

Are you an essential oil user and have pets? Let me know in the comments your tips and tricks and how you’ve used oils with your fur babies. I just may have to check out your suggestion for this little black lab that I call, “pocket dog…”

Have an awesome day today! Love and light!

The Nicest Compliment

Dear Librans,

I can’t Believe it’s already Wednesday!! Where did the week go? 😕

I just got off of work and I’ve been thinking about one of the nicest complements I’ve ever received. The one that has come up mini times and again only a few days ago was — kind. The more I think about it, the more I like it.

Now of course, I’m not kind 24/7 — I would be boring then — but I do try to treat people with understanding, empathy and love. I guess it goes back to my belief that none of us simply do things to just do them… There’s always an underlying reason behind every action or thought we have. I’m genuinely curious about those reasons.

Over the past almost year, I’ve been doing lots of social justice talks and having difficult conversations based on what’s been going on in the world around us. many times, I don’t agree with the person/people I’m having difficult talks with but I try really hard to see where they’re coming from. at the end of most of those conversations, we’ve been able to, “Agree to disagree” or come to some type of understanding.

As I sit here on my iPhone writing this short entry, I realize that I’m grateful. grateful for the fact that among all of the wonderful things and accomplishments over the years, I’m most proud of the simple, yet profound, complement of “kind.” 😇

Is there a complement that you’ve received that on the surface was so simple yet it meant the world to you? Would you mind sharing it in the comments?

Love and Light!

Why I Created the Libra’s Balance

Dear Librans,

I hope this is a fabulous Tuesday morning and Groundhog Day for you! I thought I would try something different today and right before I started my workday; especially because I have a busy evening today with my bootcamp Group and hosting a Zoom call for a nonprofit I am affiliated with.

One of the questions I am often asked is, “Will, why did you start your blog?”

I used to love writing creatively and did it just about every day… Until I grew up and became entrenched in the legal field. I slowly began writing and the style for pleadings, legal correspondence, contracts and such. I zapped my creative mindset away slowly but surely. Now I’m trying to regain my footing with this blog.

At The same time, I’ve been on a journey of re-discovery and healing so I married my two goals together — hence The Libra’s Balance. In The age of social media, I have way too much to say for a simple Facebook post and I’d love having more thoughtful conversation with a range of people. It’s my hope that this little insignificant piece of the Internet can lead to breakthroughs, especially in the climate we find ourselves here in America and across the world.

So my reasons for creating this space aren’t super complicated at all — just a search to connect with people all over the world — even during the time of COVID. I hope you stick around and if I say something that interests you, that you’ll chime in with your thoughts.

Love and Light! ☺️

Feeling a Little Blue

Dear Librans,

Today is such a weird day for me…

On one hand, I’ve been getting some interesting cases at work that will allow me to think outside the box for my clients; I’ve been finding some really great books to add to my “Want to Read” list for this year and I’m going to participate in a 6-week training course that I’ve been eager to take part in.

But on the other hand, today I started to feel very lonely.

I’m having such a lack of human contact that it feels as though I’m being crushed by it. Ordinarily, I hold myself out to be an introvert. With the self-quarantine though, sometimes it gets to me.

I’m tired of talking on the phone and over Zoom and looking at the four walls. I feel a bit sad today.

Logically, I know that everyday can’t be peaches and cream but when this feeling hits, especially during this pandemic, it really hits.

This is not going to be a long post today. I just want to ask, “Do you deal with pandemic loneliness? If so, what are some practical things you do to get over that hump?

I’m eager to hear from you. Love and Light!

Maintaining Boundaries

Dear Librans,

As I’m writing this, I’ve finished working for the day. Mondays are normally hectic for me but lately I’ve been trying to go to sleep at a reasonable hour on Sunday nights. It helps when I have my life coach classes because when I’m done, I’m really done for the day.

I’ve also started telling myself when I feel tired or distracted, “You’re wide awake and super excited!”

I’ll admit that this doesn’t always work but it does so enough that I know it’s helping. Baby steps, right?!

Well, something I’ve been working on is maintaining my boundaries. I believe, as a Libra, I must feel like I’m in balance or as close to it as possible. When people, things or events keep pushing me outside my balance area of where I not only feel comfortable but can also function, I’ve had to start really sticking to my boundaries.

This is not always easy for me.

I’ve not talked to a friend physically/virtually in a little more than a week because they pushed me outside of the area that was comfortable for me – especially since I was already dealing with something. They wanted to go on about a topic even though I said twice that I was done with the conversation. They didn’t like that, and they hung up the phone on me.

What was amazing, in the moment and even now, is that I immediately felt a load lift when the call was ended. I felt in alignment again. Of course, I don’t want anyone upset with me but in the end, if someone refuses to give me the space to breathe, there’s something wrong with that in my reality. They may feel the total opposite from me and that’s more than okay. I tried to talk it out and explain but they didn’t want to.

I’m not even opposed to them calling when they do want to talk calmly – even if we don’t agree ultimately. But I’m no longer the guy that will be denied my truth.

Look, I believe there’s an underlying reason that each of us do the things we do. We aren’t always cognizant of those reasons, but the reasons are always there. Therefore, I try hard to not write people off as useless, etc. But from now on, when I share with folks that I’m done – in the moment or a bit longer – they must listen. I can’t have a fast heartbeat from situations that don’t make sense to me.

I’m done with that mode of life…

Love and Light!

P.S. What are some things you’re working on for yourself? How do you keep it going when you want to fall back into those habits you’re trying to grow out of?

Giving Myself Some Grace

Dear Librans,

It’s been a few days since I last sat down to write. I went “back to work” after the holidays this week. My job typically shuts down for the week between Christmas eve and the new year. I decided to take the day before and after as additional days this time and it felt really good – I needed the break to just relax my mind as much as I could.

The first day back I felt really great and I started hitting my wall on Wednesday. I had already gotten out of the habit of being on a schedule. I plan on using the weekend to do some writing, playing with my little pocket dog and reading a couple of books.

I have to admit that this week also hasn’t felt great because I let the energy of what happened in Washington, D.C. get to me and I believe it zapped some of my spirit. I started reading more about the COVID-19 variants as well and it renewed some unease for me.

I didn’t stick to my strategy to start and end each day with meditation and stretching or doing Pilates during the day because I was thrown off my game plan.

I’m giving myself some grace though. Things don’t always have to go perfectly and according to plan. Sometimes, no matter how well laid out we try to make things happen, we just have to get off the trail and wind our way back and start walking again.

This week wasn’t totally horrible either. I’m part of a group where the focus is energetic attraction and there is a 6-week course that’s being offered and I believe it’s affordable for me. I’m going to take the course and I’m sure I’ll be writing more about my experiences. I’m actually pretty excited about this!

I’ve also been reading a bit more about essential oils and diffusing daily to find various oils I like. I’m so into this that I think I will start blogging about it in a real way.

Before I end this entry, I just want to say that I hope you’re having a good start to 2021. Even if things are not going so well right now, I hope they get better for you. Just keep pushing forward – even if you have to take baby steps – and at some point you’re going to look back and see that you’ve moved farther than where you were at first!

Let’s practice giving ourselves some grace throughout the year.

Love and Light!

P.S. How did your first week of the year go? Any successes or challenges?

Being Present and 2021

Dear Libra’s Balance Readers,

I genuinely hope that this Saturday is already going better for you than you expected! I love waking up in a fantastic mood, don’t you?

I’ve just made a decision for this blog – from now on when I’m writing anything under my personal category, I’m going to start with, “Dear Librans,” rather than “Dear Libra’s Balance Readers.” It feels so much more friendly to me. I’m not sure why I wrote that other than the fact it was on my mind in the moment. But alas, I digress…

I’ve been reading tons of 2021 blog entries with the themes of mindfulness, resolutions, remembering 2020, etc. I’ve loved them all but something hit home for me as I slept…

Be present in 2021!

Now I normally try to do this anyway but with the myriad of posts I’ve been reading, many focused on why resolutions don’t work and I didn’t come across an equal number talking about how they can be successful. Hence my unconscious stream of thought to be in the present.

We simply have to change the manner in which we think of life – being present in the moment and not focusing on next week, or next month, or next year – when it comes to these resolutions. Just worry about right now, this very moment.

This of course means that we have to change the language we use. Rather than saying, “I will get my finances together in 2021,” we should say, “I am already seeing increase in my finances…”

Our brains are wonderful muscles aren’t they? If we tell ourselves enough times that something is, then it will be!!

What are your thoughts about being present to be successful with your Resolutions? Even though this is not a brand new idea in the world of mindfulness, I would love to read your thoughts on whether this is a practice you already do or are willing to try. Which resolutions come to mind for you?

Love and Light!